I fell off the face of the internet more or less for the past few weeks. I don’t really want to get into it, but suffice it to say the old adage of death coming in 3’s has so far proved true for me.  I’ve had a hard time equalizing.

In other news I did not start my 30 days paleo because I put pretty much everything on the back burner the last few weeks. I’m getting back into the swing of things though, I’m in search of a new blender. Still can’t afford anything like a vitamix, but I need something better to do these green smoothies justice.

I’ve tossed around the idea of buying some new shampoo bars.  I could probably go another year on what I have already (have still I should say, as I’ve not bought any at all since December or January)  but I’d love to get a few sample sizes  of some new things just for the novelty of having something new to try.

For the next short while I’m just going to focus on breathing easy, being happy, and doing things I enjoy. I am not deterred from my goals. It’s a rocky path but I just need to find my rhythm again.

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Just coming off of another bout of whatever it is that’s plaguing me.  Tired, exhausted, unmotivated, and for one miserable day I felt entirely defeated and that my efforts were pointless.

I’m not really sure what causes this. Sleep problems I have always had, but it’s usually not quite so bad as the problem I’ve been having for the past year or two.  It’s only after days of sleeping poorly, being tired all the time, feeling too exhausted and unmotivated to even do the dishes or cook dinner that I hit a low point of depression. Where I wallow in my feelings of inadequacy and failure.

I have purchased online some of the things that I believe will be crucial to my Paleo success, the rest of it can wait for a trip to the grocery store.  I anticipate my official start of full-blown Paleo to be in a week or two. (depends on when my online orders arrive) I am sorely missing Southern California right now, with Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods, Sprouts, Henry’s, Fresh and Easy, and Farmer’s markets every which way you went. My best option for grocery shopping here is Wal-Mart, which I am not pleased about.  There are other grocery stores around, but they’re over priced.  If I went out of my way to an Aldi that’s not too shabby.  Mind you, I don’t say “over priced” because I’m comparing to Wal-Mart prices, I mean over priced, period.  I did live in Southern California for quite a while, there wasn’t even a Wal-Mart in the area that sold groceries until right before I moved away.

Anyway, I’m going to see about putting up a counter or something.  Reviews, recipes tried, general updates on how I feel will be the main focus here on the blog.  My main plan will be to pack in the micro nutrients, switch out as many bad fats for good fats as I can,  eliminate grains/gluten, and cut out all sugar. If I can be 80/20 Paleo for a majority of the 30 days (I’m going for a full 30, but I’m going to try not to beat myself up if I slip)  then I will consider the 30 day challenge successful. Dairy I’m not too worried about, I don’t typically have a lot of dairy in my diet anyway.  Rice may or may not happen.  And there is nothing on this green earth that would convince me to give up coffee. Ever.  I don’t have coffee every day though, caffeine withdrawals are not fun if one day I didn’t feel like having any.  Seriously need to look into finding some nice organic Swiss Water Process decaf.

I have a few No Poo posts to do still, but I’m having some weird dry skin/dandruff issue I’m trying to resolve first.  It’s been going on for several months. I don’t know if it’s the climate, the water, my routine, or what.  At first I thought it was a No Poo problem, as I noticed the dandruff first and it happened after I started going back to No Poo full-time. (I had to take a break because I was injured and not able to stick with the routine)  Then I noticed that my face was dry and flaky too, in fact my skin all over was generally very dry.  To be honest this could still be a No Poo problem that started  at the top and worked its way down. Either way I either need to figure out why and fix it or if it’s not because of No Poo, I need to figure out how to tweak my routine to deal with the dandruff.  I have been No Poo for about year now! Even if you don’t want to count my brief break from it.  So that’s awesome.

Even though these plans keep getting pushed back again and again, I don’t feel I’ve lost the momentum. It just has more time to build!

A Disclaimer.

June 27, 2013

I am not a Nutritionist, or a fitness expert, and I am certainly not a doctor.  Whether or not something is healthy, good, and safe for me is a matter of opinion, based on my research and my current personal health, as determined by an actual doctor.  It will not  apply to everyone.  So I encourage everyone to do their research, talk to their own doctor, come to their own conclusions.

I do not cite a lot of resources for that reason.

Don’t get me wrong, I do a lot of research.  A lot.  For example, I said in the previous post that when I tried researching the Primal diet/lifestyle, I only found a lot of conflicting info.  What that means is I’m going to keep looking.  I’m going to try to figure out why that is, and try to isolate the grains of truth/science behind conflicting sources. I have to understand things.  It’s my nature. “Just because” is never acceptable.

I won’t do something if I don’t feel like I understand what I’m doing, or at the very least, I have to know that my lack understanding won’t cause myself or anyone else damage or harm.  I also won’t try to explain something if I don’t feel like I know about it well enough to discuss it.

However, that does not mean that I’m always correct. I am not beyond totally misunderstanding the information I’m taking in, or being mistaken of the veracity of the information.

I do not want anyone to ever just believe me, just because. Never.  I also don’t want to be someone’s short cut.  We all know that one person, who asks a question because they know someone else will just tell them, or look it up for them, because it’s easier/faster than figuring it out for themselves.

I DO give credit where credit is due. If I am talking about a specific product, I will link to that product. If I am directly quoting something, I will link to a source.  So if I’ve tried someone else’s recipe for example, I’m going to link to that recipe. If I fall in love with  hemp oil or a new shampoo bar, I’ll certainly direct you to the brand I’m using, and any other brand I may have tried for that matter.

So, to sum up. I’m not the authority on any given subject, nor will I act as if I am. Pretty much everything I post should be treated a matter of opinion, even if I appear to be stating something factual.  Check them before you share them or actually try to use the information!

Some big changes!

June 26, 2013

I feel like everything I try to do so far this year I fail at.  Keeping up with blogging? fail.  Trying to get into shape? fail. Trying to do anything on more than a once every 2-3 week basis? FAIL!

I’m pretty sure I’m not depressed.  Although sometimes all that overwhelming fail did get me down for a few days.  I’m pretty familiar with depression, and while I haven’t been able to keep interest in my goals, it’s not that I don’t want to do them.  I want to! I really really want to!  I just don’t have a lot of get up and go lately. More days than not I feel sluggish, I feel like my brain is full of sludge.

Here in the near future I plan on going paleo/primal for at least 30 days.  Probably starting around Mid-july hopefully.   If you’re unfamiliar with the Paleo diet, google is your friend here.  Same with Primal.  The watered down over simplified version is that as Humans we probably eat a whole lot of crap that we don’t need to eat, and would be much healthier without.  We evolved eating a certain kind of diet. Lots of raw food like fruits, veggies, nuts and seeds.  Meat of course.   Probably not a lot of grains, if any.  Probably not a lot of dairy, if any. No refined sugars, nothing bleached.   That’s a lot of “probably”  because scientists can’t say for sure “Yes, people X years ago only ate these things”   They have a pretty good idea, but it is up for debate.  What “Primal” is seems a little trickier.  I’ve only found a lot of conflicting info on that.  For the most part here I’m using it to imply that I plan to sometimes have dairy and rice. It seems that according to some people dairy/grains once in a while means that you’re not “officially” paleo, and that you’re primal.  While those people seem ridiculously nit picky, that just seems to be the way it is for some.

I’ve been drawn to it, for over a year or two actually, because it just makes sense.  I see how healthy people who follow it are.  I’ve seen the change it can make in their lives.  I’ve seen what good eating more raw food does.  What good going gluten-free does, cutting back dairy.  So why not do the whole shebang?  Just give it a try.  Can’t hurt, might help, right?  The longer it goes, the more reasons I see to do it.  I know I can’t keep going the way I’m going.  I’ve been to the doctor, there’s nothing wrong with me.  So something has to give.

My plans are to post what I’m eating, recipes I’ve found, products I’m using (I plan to get some coconut oil, hemp oil, chia seeds, coconut mana, almond/coconut/tapioca flour etc), how I feel, changes I’m noticing, if it’s doing anything for me.  My main goal, or hope, for this is to just feel better, feel like a functioning human being again.  That’s it, if any other benefits come with just changing the way I eat, that’s gravy.   Eat better, feel better, live better.  My only expectation.

Unconventional is at least a real word.

(disclaimer: although there are a few bits of real grammatical information here that I gleaned from other internet sources, it’s MOSTLY about my personal preference over which word I used for this page) 

I’m really not sure if “nonconventional” is a legitimate word, or if it should be hyphenated even.  Google will give you some definitions, but just because there’s a definition for “ain’t”  doesn’t mean it’s a proper word.

I did choose non over un for very specific reasons. True, for the most part they mean the same thing. Definitions found for unconventional versus nonconventional are pretty much the same. (I suspect because one of them is proper and one is not so they apply the same definition.) From my point of view,  un can also mean the reversal, so in a manner of speaking, being in opposition. I am not opposed to conventionality, nor do I seek to purposely go against it for the sake of being against it.

I just ignore it most of the time.  There’s plenty of conventional things that I do in conventional ways, but I never like to do something simply because that’s how popular opinion says it should be done. Sometimes I’m moving in the same direction as the crowd, but I’m not part of the crowd. And there’s nothing wrong with the crowd either.

As a disclaimer, I never assume that my way, my opinions, or my choices are ever any better for anyone or anything else beyond my own life.  They’re just better for me. My personal preferences should never be taken as a judgement against others. (although I am not so naive as to think that such a statement will prevent it) If one were to say their favorite color is orange and they hate the color green, no one else would assume that it’s a personal attack or judgement against people who adore the color green.

I never really explained my choices of blog name before, and it’s not precisely necessary to explain my self either.  Post military I feel like I have more room to breathe, and I feel like it’s so much more important to delve into the reasons behind certain things that I do.  Life is so much more uncertain, while at the same time I no longer feel weighed down by uncertainty.  I think this is going to be good.